Who Should Pay for the First Date? Let’s Finally End the Debate
Who should pay for the first date?
This is one of the most common topics that comes up when I talk to guys over 50 who are part of the Throwback Dating community.
They’ve said…
“I’m all for women’s equality, but when it comes to dating it feels like there’s no balance… and very little appreciation.”
Let’s break this down.
It’s Not About the Money - It’s About the Gesture
Ladies, hear me out on this.
Men are not asking you to pay.
They’d love it if you made a genuine offer to split it.
That small, sincere offer communicates so much about who you are:
You’re thoughtful
You’re appreciative
You’re not entitled
You see dating as a shared experience, not a one-sided service
Most men will still pick up the tab.
But that sincere offer makes them feel valued and respected.
Dating Over 50 is a Different Landscape
Most men and women I meet in this community are:
✔️ Independent
✔️ Established
✔️ Successful
✔️ Fully capable of paying for themselves
So the real question isn’t:
“Who pays?”
It’s:
“What energy are you bringing to the date?”
When the energy is balanced, respectful, and appreciative… the connection deepens.
Keep the First Date SIMPLE
If the goal is to genuinely get to know each other then an expensive dinner isn’t necessary.
That’s why I always recommend:
➡️ Meet for an appetizer and a drink
➡️ Choose somewhere comfortable and quiet
➡️ Focus on conversation, not cost
Lead With the Energy You Want to Attract
If you want a partner who feels supportive and wants to build something meaningful with you, show that energy from the start.
❤️ Megan
Megan Wessels
I’m a Wing Woman for single guys over 50 who are trying to navigate this modern dating world. Through my company Throwback Dating I create fun opportunities for singles over 45 to connect organically. No more games, no more dating pressure.
